Everytime i think of my past, tears will just welled up in my eyes.

i don't understand why i am so ill fated. why my life is so miserable? why couldn't my mother just be like what other ppl's mother does? what exactly had she done for me in my life? the ans will always be negative.

you may see me as what i am today but u will never know how i felt or what i had been through this 19 years of my life.

i started teaching since i am primary 5 for that pathetic 20 bucks. And what makes it worst was i had to give 10 bucks to my mother. for earning that 20 bucks, i gotta walk all the way from my house bedok south to Bedok NORTH. And i had never stop teaching since then. i alway tell myself, this will make me grow to be a stronger and independent girl which other ppl would not experience. However, while telling myself that, i would just keep crying non stop.

Why do i have to earn money to support myself? Why do my mother only care bout herself? What's her role as a mother?

i am lucky to have my eldest sister. She makes a good mother where always sparing a thought for us. buying things for us. she's a mother and sister to me. At least i can proudly present her to everyone of u. she does things unconditionally and never once self fish. she gives us the best if she could. i thank god for her. without her, i wouldnt be what i am.

she too, was force to work at a young age, but she would save those money up to buy us watches. i could still remember the tweety bird watch received during christmas. she's really nice whereas my mother, i could never think of what she had bought or do for me. perhaps just giving me an nutshell( house) and endless nagging and bugging me to give her money. i simply hate her for tt.

my mother never once washed my clothes. even when i am a baby, it was my sis who washed my clothes. my mother never once buy me anythin except this lappy that i am using and i had to pay her back monthly. my mother never once asking me do i in need of money or giving me money, she only asked me for money. my mother never once asked me to stop working, only forcing me to keep working.

can u guys tell me is she a mother or a leech that sucks my blood?